Aspire to Be Boring

Moving On.

I look forward to a day when Trenton is a wholly-unremarkable small city on the Delaware River.

A day when you don’t even notice that there’s nothing in the newspaper or on TV about the place. Again.

A day when police officers punching in to work wonder – in a good way – how they’re going to make it through another day when hardly anything interesting ever happens, and that kind of day just drags on forever, you know?

A day when parents kiss their children as they head off to school, slightly concerned as always that the schools are giving their babies so much homework, but mostly happy that they do so. “They must know what they’re doing, because graduation and college placement rates are always so good!” is what they tell each other.

A day when homeowners are visibly annoyed (but secretly happy) that they can hardly even go out to pick up their mail without hearing from visitors in front of their homes asking if they know of any houses for sale in their neighborhood. “We’ve always wanted to live in Trenton, but there’s almost never anyone moving out!” Well, that’s what happens when kids finish school and choose to stay in town to work. The job opportunities are all here, and the cost of living is so reasonable.

A day when having to wait for a red light to change at an intersection doubles your morning commute time walking to work.

A day when you think that it’s kind of a shame Gordon Ramsay will probably never have to visit Trenton to fix a restaurant here because they’re all pretty good and all doing pretty well. You wonder if you’ll ever have a chance to find out if he really is as much of a son of a bitch as he seems to be on TV. Say, speaking of which, where should we go tonight? So many to choose from.

A day when the tax bill comes in the mail and it’s down again for, what is it, the 7th, 8th year in a row? And you wonder how the City can manage to keep doing this year after year? The City keeps doing more and more, and it’s costing less and less. “The mayor and city council are sure earning their pay this year” you think.

A day when you have to think hard to remember who the mayor is, anyway, and who the folks are on city council. They do their work so quietly and competently, it’s  easy to forget that there’s someone down in City Hall taking care of things. It all seems to run itself without any drama.

This is a day a long, long way away from any Heaven or Earth that can be dreamt of in your philosophy, Horatio.

But it is one day closer, today.